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Snuggles, pep talks and love notes: 10 ways to calm your kid鈥檚 back-to-school jitters

The transition back to school can be overwhelming for kids. Explaining the changes and setting expectations can help them feel more prepared to take on the year.
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The transition back to school can be overwhelming for kids. Explaining the changes and setting expectations can help them feel more prepared to take on the year.

New teachers, classmates, routines and expectations -- a new school year almost always means change for both kids and their caregivers. And that can be nerve-wracking for everyone.

To help families ease into the transition, Life Kit asked teachers, pediatricians and child development experts for their best back-to-school advice. These tips have been edited for length and clarity.

馃槾 Adjust your child's summer sleep schedule to a school schedule. At least one or two weeks before school starts, move bedtime and wake-up time up by 15-minute increments every few days until the desired schedule is reached. , pediatrician and sleep consultant  

馃摎Gradually reintroduce structure into a child鈥檚 daily routine to help them prepare for school. Add a 15-minute block of educational content to your kid鈥檚 routine, such as a read-aloud, math puzzle or . , early childhood literacy consultant 

馃棷 Remind kids that almost everyone feels a little nervous on the first day of school. Naming and describing an emotion and letting children know you understand how they feel can help them feel more in control over their feelings instead of feeling overwhelmed by them. , pediatric psychologist, Nemours Children's Health

馃棑 To ease a child鈥檚 anxiety about going back to school, help them understand what to expect. As Daniel Tiger sings, 鈥淲hen we do something new, let鈥檚 talk about what we鈥檒l do.鈥 Remind them that 鈥済rown-ups come back鈥 [at the end of the school day] 鈥 and they can share their new experiences at school with their loved ones. , director of learning and education at , producers of the TV show

鉂揟alk to your child about how they might handle challenging situations, even if they are not likely to happen. For example, if your son is worried about getting lost in a new school, help him problem solve by creating a plan about what he would do if that did happen so he feels more prepared and confident. 鈥擫eah Orchinik, pediatric psychologist, Nemours Children's Health

馃憢 Make up a special goodbye ritual together. can be challenging. But you can create daily memories your child will cherish for years to come. Say, 鈥淪ee you later, alligator! In a while, crocodile!鈥, do a special handshake or enjoy an extra-long hug. You can also kiss your child鈥檚 palm and then hold each other鈥檚 hands tightly to 鈥渟eal it in.鈥 Tell your child to remember they鈥檒l carry your kiss with them all day long, and they can do the same for you! , senior vice president of U.S. social impact, Sesame Workshop

鈽曪笍 Fill their connection cup before and after school. Even if you're tired in the morning, set that alarm for 15 minutes earlier so you can have a snuggle session with your child. Read a book together. Have breakfast together. When you pick them up from school, be aware they will need another connection cup top-up. Sometimes they will present with this after-school meltdown because they're so depleted., author of Discipline without Damage

馃Л Make sure your child knows how to navigate their world in tech-free ways. Even if your child has a smartphone, make sure they know what to do if they鈥檙e approached by a stranger, how to get help for an injury and other street smarts. Help isn鈥檛 always a button away. 鈥, author of Sharenthood 

馃挕 Discuss family or classroom conflicts with your child. Have a daily conversation topic such as, 鈥淲hat鈥檚 been a good or hard part about your day?鈥 or 鈥淲hat rules do we need to help everyone feel loved and respected?鈥 Then have a weekly discussion to keep things on track and make kids part of problem-solving. , author of How to Raise Kind Kids

馃摚 Pour positive words of affirmation into your children on a daily basis. For example, 鈥淚 love you. I鈥檓 proud of you. It鈥檚 going to be a great day. It's OK to make mistakes.鈥 Parents can leave notes inside their child's lunch boxes. Or I've had parents ask me to write a sticky note on their child's desk for them. These messages allow a kid to feel powerful and confident throughout the day. 鈥擩arod Renford, first grade teacher in Washington, D.C.


The digital story was edited by Malaka Gharib. The visual editor is Beck Harlan. We'd love to hear from you. Leave us a voicemail at (202) 216-9823, or email us at LifeKit@npr.org.

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Copyright 2024 NPR

Becky Harlan is a visual and engagement editor for NPR's Life Kit.
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